Trip Report
by Stephen "Buckshot-B" Benton
Preface: "Once in a great while, there comes an article so breathtakingly
stupid, so heroic in its inanity, that as one reads it, even inanimate objects
in the surrounding area seem to radiate intelligence by comparison."
-Some guy on the
Internet
That pretty much sums up this report! ATLARGE 2003
Oh me, oh my. How to begin this report? To tell you the truth, I didn't really
do much with the fellow 'Argers. I attended the smoker, took some video for
posterity and that was about it. I did play some Pink and PL in which I got
thoroughly spanked. After getting raped in both games I decided not to play in
them again. I hear afterwards two PL games were started in the suite but I
didn't get wind of it until after the game broke. I would've been Steve
"IFSATG" Carbonara's bitch anyway considering I can't seem to put enough chips
into the pot after saying raise. I heard raising $5 just makes him lick his
chops.
Ronald "Baltimore Ron" Wilson, Dennis "PSU72" Frey and I made the trek
together and bunked together. We talked much about the upcoming weekend. I made
resolutions to play solid and make a final table or two, as did the other guys.
Unfortunately, I didn't do either. I played pretty solid and made some
"sketchy" 3-bets according to my friends but there's history there that
supercedes all rationalization. But I digress. I'll go into a little detail
about the few hours that preceded the Smoker.
The first game I plopped down in was a nice $15-$30 Holdem game. I didn't make
any headway for the first hour and was almost down to the felt from my initial
buyin of $400. At about the same time a young Asian guy with a root beer and
some sort of snack he tried to pawn off to the table hunkered down. He looked
an awful lot like a guy I saw on the Internet. A guy named Terrance Chan, but
this guy had a smooth haircut much like mine. I decided he was ultra cool, you
know, because of his haircut and all. It also didn't hurt that he was Asian, so
there's a natural affinity there. I was on a small run when I finally buckled
down and asked if he was who I thought he was. He confirmed my assumption and
we made formal introductions. Terrance is a great guy and has the typical Asian
constitution. I heard he only had a couple of hours of sleep before the HOE
tourney. I had QQ cracked by a set of 33's and I was about to go noodle on the
entire table. But I staved off the tilt and proceeded to charge forward. I wish
I recalled all the hands that brought me back from the cellar but the only
thing I remember is catching flops and leaving the table for the smoker
positive $150 in about an hour. I asked Terrance if he was going to the smoker
to which he replied, "What, and leave this fishy game?" Seriously, I think he
mentioned something about an aversion to smoke. Eh, to each his own.
I was a bit off about what time the smoker started and since I already
picked up from the $15 game I was standing around like a dorf. I managed to hop
into a newly started $10-$20 Holdem game. Shortly afterwards I was joined by a
studly gentleman by the name of David "Greatplans" Fruchter. I introduced
myself and felt that I made a new friend in Dave. I asked Dave if he planned on
attending the smoker. He said he wouldn't miss it for the world. We had a great
time talking and playing together. After about a hour and half and getting Aces
cracked by an UTG caller with 3h7h I decided to take my winnings and start
drinking a little early. I found my friend Dennis sitting in a $5-$10 Holdem
game so I decided to sweat him for a while. I was quickly bored after I watched
him throw Presto away in the BB after a raiser and 3 cold callers. I was
getting that poker itch again and settled into a $3-$6 game. After all, I was
drinking so there was no reason to play any higher and besides, I could put
everyone at the table on tilt with my loud drunken ways. There were about 3
people able to collect social security at the table. What better way to bring
ATLARGE to a screaming start than getting the locals all riled up. It didn't
take long since I had a little help from my newly made friend, David Fruchter.
I played blind Holdem raising and reraising. It reminded me of BARGE '01 when
Robert "ActionBob" Hwang and I did the same thing to the locals at Binion's
playing $4-$8. This time, I was with Dave. There was one hand where Dave and I
were in together, playing blind of course, and we were headsup after the flop.
On the turn I bet then turned a card up after Dave called. I think I had a pair
and Dave has some sort of draw. We were laughing so hard I was shooting beer
from my nose. I ended up taking it down with that same pair. But what we didn't
notice was that one of the older ladies complained to the floor about our
behavior and the fact we turned up our cards before the hand was over. Dave and
I continued to laugh and carry on and I think the lady eventually left. One
time I was laughing and yelling so loud that the table behind us was starting
to grumble. I took a stack of white chips and tipped everyone at the table.
Then I tipped the dealer a redbird. Needless to say, they didn't complain
again. I took about $200 out of the game with my antics. Dave and I racked up
and headed out.
Smoker
The smoker was a pretty good time. Rob drove Ron and me after I got my
video camera from the room. I'm a little upset with myself that I didn't use
the camera more often in the tourneys. I should've at least recorded the final
table action. Maybe if there's a BARGE this year I'll try to make more of a
concerted effort. I bought a couple Don Diego Playboy's, AVO #10, and a H.
Upmann Tubos for Rob and myself. I kept the AVO and we smoked the rest. I
recommend the Playboy to anyone who likes a smooth Connecticut wrap. Nothing
much happened at the smoker except Matt "Treasure" Treasure hitting on every
woman in the joint, and maybe some guys too. What do you do if Bill Chen moves
in with the biggest stack at a final table behind a short stack all in? Oh, and
in case anyone missed it, Matt won $10,000 at a Pokerstars.com tournament in
February and you call right behind him with Queens. With that being said, it
was a good time shared by all. Russell Fox shared a Mike Laing story that can
only be executed as succinctly by him so I won't make an attempt. Congrats to
Chuck Taylor for winning the over/under and giving me a piece of the action
after talking him out of bidding $1,800. Sheesh, Chuck, what were you thinking?
Holdem, Omaha, Eight or Better
The H.O.E. tourney. I forgot to write down who the other players at the
table were. From memory I'm going with Linda "Llew" Lewis, Chris "Chris"
O'Connor, Dave "Dave!" Croson, Sabyl "Sabyl" Cohen and my arch nemesis, Paul
"prm" McMullin. That guy made the 3rd level so horrible for me I thought he was
a prop in an online game. Every Omaha hand I played at 75-150, whether or not I
raised made no difference; Paul made sure he was in every pot. Like a scorching
case of Hemorrhoids, he was a pain in my keister. I must've lost every hand on
the river to him, hence the reason for the expression on my face in the paper.
But no hard feelings, I'll exact my revenge at BARGE or next year's ATLARGE.
Just you wait and see. Anyhow, I never claimed to be an Omaha expert and I
think I just played too many hands during that round. Joan "AlwaysAware" Hadley
and ActionBob made their way to our table. Bob eventually made it to the final
table. Congrats! I exited the tourney in 36th or something. Looking over my
notes I noticed that I did play way too many hands in Omaha. Not the choice
recipe for Omaha success.
My favorite hand
I'm sitting in this game with a few decent players; one of the better
players is 2 to my right. The guy on my immediate right is Vkotlyar, a regular
2+2 poster. This one Asian guy (the local's call him Mumbles) and I were in a
hand that caused some confusion because he didn't understand I was checking
blind on the river. He got a 30 minute penalty after being obnoxious but never
left the area of the table. Unfortunately, since this guy was funding everyone
at the table we tried our best the get him to stay and we couldn't talk the
floor into changing their minds. Anyway, he comes back into the game and in 1/2
hour I'm about down to the felt from some set backs. I have close to $50 in
mid-late position. UTG limps, Vkotlyar limps and I look down to see 9hTh. Not a
bad hand, eh, considering the action? I know that Mumbles will be calling and I
figure that both blinds will call too. Maybe even more! Everyone else folds and
the blinds call. There are 6 people in this pot. The flop comes down 7h 8c 4s.
This might be a good flop for my hand, eh? It gets checked around to me so I
bet. Mumbles calls and everyone folds to the UTG guy, he calls. Vkotlyar, right
next to me calls. Now, I'm about all in here. So….4 way action on the turn
and a Qh falls. UTG checks and Vkotlyar bets. Well, shit. What am I going to do
here? I do the most obvious thing. I raise all in. I figure it's the best bet
and I have many, many outs. Mumbles, the UTG and Vkotlyar all call. I figure it
was promising there wasn't a reraise. So now there's a small side pot. The
river brings a 2c. Now I'm all fucked, right? UTG folds his hand in disgust.
Vkotlyar and Mumbles check. Vkotlyar shows 6d 9d and I stay very still since
this is for the side pot. Mumbles shows Tc 6c and I'm just about to bust out of
my seat! Mumbles takes the side pot and I proudly show my Th 9h for the main
pot! Ship da Cheese!
NL Tourney
At the onset of the NL tourney I was pleasantly surprised at the table
lineup. Excuse me if I get any of your names wrong. Starting with Seat 1 and
working clockwise: Steve "Rookie" Zang, Matt "jacksup" Matros, Ron "Baltimore
Ron" Wilson, Rick "Rick Becker", Barry "FourThree" Kornspan, Peter "Pocket AK"
Edivan, Me, Pat "CtheTurn" Kirwan. Shit. I'm missing someone. Cest Lavie. After
Matt busted out, Warren Sander, the guy that crippled me, replaced him. I was
doing real well at the table up to that point I was the table chip leader with
~T2200 at the 3rd level. I had AsAc UTG and bought it in for $100. Warren cold
called near the button and we're heads-up on the flop that was K22 2 diamonds.
I checked hoping he hit the King to trap him, but he checked behind at which
point I said, "Diamond, please." A diamond hit and I bet, I think, T200. He
comes over the top to make it ~T500? I reraised again putting T1,200 then he
jams. Well, shit, I fold. He showed Ad5d for the flush. I said, "Nice call
preflop," and went ahead on my business. Ladies and Gentlemen, if there's
anyway to butcher a hand that was the way. I get moved to the table of death
and I see: Sabyl, Ira "J-E-T-S" Pilser, Mitch "ADB BFB" Firestone, Matt
"Roswell" Kiristis, Scott "Bwana" Byron, Chris "8-2 Chris" Raimondi, Bill "ADV
Bill Chen" Chen, and a guy named Mike. I tried to bust Bwana out with some
suited crap (I think it was 8dTd) since I was the 2nd shortest stack with ~T600
and he had something like T325. He picked me off with AcJc. After the break I
get moved to Steve "Crunch" Daniel, Bruce "ADB Big Boy" Kramer, Peter "Tray
Racer" Segal, Johnathan "RollaJ" Cohen, Mitch "Mitch" Kramer, Edward "Pizzaman"
Pizzarello, Bert "Toast" Hackney and some guy named Chris. I went all in a
couple of times at this table. The first time with 9sTs and Crunch called with
something and catch a Ten on the turn. The last time with Presto and lost (how
the fuck does that happen?) when Bruce has Queens in the SB. The nerve!
America's Playground
There was a ton of stuff that happened during the ATLARGE weekend that
made it memorable for me. I especially liked the Ten high showdown win. At the
suite Goldie and Fruchter were discussing politics and stuff when Goldie said
something about him being Jewish and Dave retorted something of a political
nature. It had to do with the war and money and such and I pretended to be
entirely rapt in the conversation. Then at an intense moment during their
debate I interrupted the conversation and said, in all seriousness, "Wait a
minute, wait a minute, guys." I stared directly at Goldie and said, "You're
Jewish?!?!" Meeting Fruchter was a riot and playing the $3-$6 no peek, blind
raise with him was even more riotous. It's too bad I didn't get a chance to try
some of his homemade pasta. I hear he works wonders in the kitchen. It was also
great to see Matt, Goldie, Chic, Joan, Carbonara and others again. I wish I had
the time to make the trek up to AC every week like I did last year. It was also
great to meet Terrance. I hope to swap stories and trade secrets with him in
the years to come. Terrance, I'm planning on making it to Costa Rica soon. I
promise. There was only one time when a gruff and asinine dealer disrupted the
festivities. Goldie, ActionBob and I were playing $15-$30 when a dealer named
Andy sat in the box. He had an attitude about "something" and we all noticed
when he sat down. Whatever was the catalyst of Andy's aggression Goldie didn't
really help matters by telling him to "Shut up and deal". Andy responded
immediately by telling Goldie to never say shut up. After that we got a little
quite and Goldie stopped telling Andy to shut up and deal, instead, he was
telling him to shuffle up and deal. This got us laughing again except Andy
didn't find it amusing. Eventually a heated exchange ensued between Andy and
Goldie and Goldie racked up and left. I said, "Thanks a bunch, dealer. You got
the biggest fish in the game to leave." ActionBob and I never tipped Andy and I
vowed to never tip him again. If a dealer can't have fun at one of these events
with a bunch of tip reckless drunks hamming it up at a table, then he/she
probably should find a different line of work. I ate dinner with Russell and
his wife, Anne. There were other 'Argers at another table but we ended up at
the kiddie table. It was nice to chew the fat with them. Anne described their
first date and the best part was Russell asking her back to his place. Oh, and
congratulations on the little one. All in all, it was another successful event
with memories I'll enjoy for years to come. I'm certainly hoping BARGE will be
held someplace so we may again enjoy the company of friends. I'm all for
soliciting the Palms to host the event. Anyway, take care everyone!
~stephen
aka Buckshot
